http://aissab.blogdrive.com/ ella Tue, 11 Oct 2005 21:10:11 PDT http://www.blogdrive.com Copyright 2005. http://aissab.blogdrive.com/archive/4.html Wed, 12 Oct 2005 05:05:14 GMT Found Poem III And I’m supposed to not say anything vaguely from the conscious, because a few boys say so. And I’m supposed to neatly square everything inside the flat cut of a porticullis. And one says that no lists are allowed, nothing like a catalogue, nothing where my head turns around. And there’s still another who listens between meals to no one but himself. And there’s a few women there, too. But they look like men. http://aissab.blogdrive.com/comments?id=4 http://aissab.blogdrive.com/archive/3.html Wed, 12 Oct 2005 05:04:27 GMT I have a rule about music, and it is this: All pop singers are either Ethel Merman Singers or Fozzie Bear Singers. This rule, known Ethel or Fozzie Rule, applies only to singers whose careers began after April 1970, the month the Beatles broke up. I discovered this rule in the Spring of 1987, when, stoned on hashish perched atop a re-hot paperclip, and it became more and more evident that the histrionics of hard rock were conflated with Broadway show tunes (Ethel Merman), and the mellow, holier-than-thou, subdued vocals of soft pop and college rock, which had diverted into a bathetic... (more) http://aissab.blogdrive.com/comments?id=3 http://aissab.blogdrive.com/archive/2.html Wed, 14 Sep 2005 22:33:39 GMT It seems strange to talk about it now -- to take something so private and place it in such a public place -- particularly since keeping it secret was so important when I was younger. I imagine I must have been about sixteen, and I had just about figured out that I was gay. Tony was nearly fifteen -- I went to school with him, although he was in a different year. I met him at a society at school. He was everything that I didn't feel that I was: confident, athletic and attractive. I had been incredibly quiet ... it was an all-boys' school and being gay was not really an option. I just tried... (more) http://aissab.blogdrive.com/archive/1.html Wed, 31 Aug 2005 02:08:36 GMT What's up with me... you have no idea how much I want to write a positive entry!! I really hate the whining... but then after I beat myself up for a while I remind myself of the purpose of this journal and that is to have a record of the bad days as well as the good ones. So if there are more bad than good then I have to keep track of them. Ok.. so I am considering asking the dr. today if I can stop lithium. The weight I am gaining is making me very depressed and I can't take that. I shaved my head yesterday in the hopes of losing a couple pounds.. lol.. no just kidding... I did cut it... (more) http://aissab.blogdrive.com/comments?id=1